10 Reasons Why You Are So Ugly
As children we all hear the story about the ugly duckling – the drab, grey bird who looks so unlike his sleek, beautiful siblings. That story has a happy ending as he changes into a beautiful swan, 10 times more beautiful than the people who mocked him. Alternatively we read books or watch films where the ‘pretty ugly girl’ becomes beautiful over the course of the story as people learn to see her for what she really is and she learns to be confident in her own skin.
For some people these stories give hope, for others, however, the stories are a cruel hoax. Not all ugly ducklings are, however, swans in disguise, not all ugly girls have a pretty one waiting behind their glasses and not all geeks will get the girl in the end.
It is easy for others (often people we perceive as beautiful) to say that hankering after beauty is mere vanity. It can be depressing to be ugly in a world of beautiful people but what can you do about it? Beauty is, so they say, in the eye of the beholder and the chances are that you are your worst critic. Cleopatra, one of the reputedly most beautiful women of all time was, by modern standards, extremely ugly. She was a bald , wore a wig, had a hooked nose and fairly fat, fleshy face. She was also witty, with a musical voice and stimulating character and the key political figures of the day fought a war because of love for her!
If there are things about your appearance that bother you the chances are that there are things you can do to change them. Here are the top 10 reasons why you are (or think you are) ugly and how to change them!
10. You think you are fat
We live in an age obsessed with weight and size. Magazines advertise clothing on models who are not only paid to be extremely thin (so that the clothes hang well) and beautiful. The photographs in these magazines are, however, touched up. Every single one of the photographs you see is a lie. The most beautiful women and men in the world, the people who are paid to devote all their time to their appearance, fall so far from our standards of beauty that, in order to be able to sell products, their images have to be altered – a bit of weight trimmed off the hips, a few inches added to the legs, those bingo wings erased.
Most magazines are honest about the retouching and everyone knows that it happens. It is easy to believe that if you follow the health, beauty and fitness advice contained in the magazines and on ‘beauty and fashion’ websites you too can look like the models in them. The truth is, however, that you will never meet that goal. Our perception of normal, healthy beauty has been skewed by the application of technology. The best thing you can do is ditch the magazines or, at the very least, acknowledge that they are pedaling a big fat lie.
Whether or not you are a healthy weight will depend on so many factors – 120lb might be seriously underweight for one person but completely normal and healthy for another. The best way to work out if you are a healthy weight for your size is to check your Body Mass Index. This gives you guidelines – if your reading is above average you should think about losing some weight. If you fall within the normal range you have nothing to worry about (although if you feel bad about your body it might help to do some exercise to tone up your muscles).
9. You have bad skin
Did you know that our skin is the largest organ in our body. It protects us from the sun, helps excrete toxins and regulates the environment within our bodies. It is also one of the most visible outward manifestations of physical beauty. Almost everybody, if asked, would aspire to have plump, blemish free, dewy skin. Sadly just about the only people who have this type of skin without putting in serious effort are babies and young children.
From the teenage years struggles with larger pores, blackheads, pimples and huge pizza like zoids are sadly all too common not to mention the horrible blind hormonal spots that many women get on their chins once a month. It can be tempting to think that if your skin is less than perfect then you are going to be perceived as ugly. The truth is many people, even celebrities, struggle with poor skin. Those same magazines that retouch already skinny women (or muscular men) to make them look ‘more perfect’ (see above) will also perform miracles of photo retouching to remove any blemishes, pimples etc that appear. The same will be done for actors in films or on stage.
There are, luckily, some things you can do to combat bad skin. Firstly, if you are a female suffering from hormonal spots then certain brands of birth control pill can help to moderate the impact. Other bad skin problems can be tackle by different medications so, in the first instance, a visit to a dermatologist might be a good place to start.
There are adverts galore for expensive skin care systems that promise (alongside heavily retouched photographs that have no bearing on reality) to give you perfect skin. Most of these systems will do the same thing. In essence you need a soap free pH balanced cleanser (you could pay a lot but something off the shelf from Target will also do the job as long as it is right for your skin type), a toner and a moisturizer with good SPF sun protection. You need to moisturize, even if your skin is very oily. Follow your regimen morning and night (at night you can use a richer moisturizer) and use a gentle exfoliant once a week. Within a short time you will see an improvement in the quality of your skin. One thing to be pleased about – if you have greasy, pimple prone skin, you are less likely to get wrinkles as early on as someone with more perfect looking skin so you will look young and healthy for years in the future.
In addition to your daily skin care regime make sure to drink 8 glasses of water a day – this will help flush out toxins and keep your skin looking plump and hydrated. Remember that while you are likely to think your bad skin is the most noticeable thing about you the chances are that others do not perceive it as badly as you do. The chances also are that people who are truly your friends can look beyond any pimples and flaws on your skin to see the beautiful aspects of your body and personality.
8. You have bad hair
The chances are that whether your hair is curly, straight, blonde or dark you wish that it looked different. Hair is such an integral part of our personalities that if something goes wrong with it people often experience a loss of confidence.
The good news is that hair is easy to fix and relatively simple to style (within limits) to the specifications you want. If you are brunette but feel more confident as a blonde – go for it! If you have curly hair you can get it relaxed with a so called ‘Brazilian blow dry’ to make it smoother and straighter.
However you like to style your hair you are likely to feel better if it is as healthy as it can be. Try not to over wash it – people with greasy hair are often tempted to wash every day but unless this is absolutely necessary going at least a day between washes will help maintain its condition. Use a shampoo appropriate to your hair type, it can take some experimenting to find a version you are happy with and you may need to change it every few months to prevent build up. Always condition your hair after a shampoo and use an intensive conditioner once a week. Don’t apply too much of any one product and make sure that they rinse out completely otherwise your hair will end up looking dull. Applying oil after towel drying will also help to lock in moisture and promote shine and, while it can be tempting to blow dry and use hot straighteners to make it look its best these items can damage your hair so make sure that you use a protective spray every time you apply heat to your hair.
Lastly a good cut will help you feel more confident. A professional stylist will be able to help you chose a style that suits you and makes the most of your features as well as being easy to maintain.
If you feel that your hair is letting you down invest some time in researching the right products and style and you will start to feel more confident, both about your hair and about yourself.
7. Your face is not symmetrical
The human perception of beauty is predicated on symmetry – simply put we believe that people with symmetrical faces are more beautiful than those whose faces are not. Many of us believe that we have our ‘good’ side, which we prefer to be seen in photographs. Photographic experiments show that where our portraits are manipulated to give us perfect symmetry our faces will look radically different. People whose faces are naturally more symmetrical tend to be happy with both the right side and left side symmetry photographs whereas people with less symmetrical faces will often prefer one photograph more than the other.
Short of expensive and painful plastic surgery there is not much that you can do to make your face more symmetrical if it is not. You can, however, play about with your photograph by using online tools to see what your face would look like if it were completely symmetrical. This will help you to identify the features of your face with which you are most satisfied so that you can concentrate and build on these.
6. You are flabby
Even if you are not fat (see above) you may be lacking in muscle tone. It is perfectly possible to have a healthy BMI and eat well but have a little wobble on your tummy or thighs. In reality this is usually not much of a problem because, if you are in the healthy range the chances are that you have magnified the problem out of proportion and that you see the wobble far more than others do. If, however, you are uncomfortable with your figure and want to do something about it you have a relatively easy fix.
Getting fit and toning up is easier today than it has ever been. A quick search of your smartphone apps will give you any number of free programs that claim to help tone you up in a matter of days. The thing to remember, however, is that the quicker a fix a program promises the less likely it is to deliver.
If you want to tone up you should aim to exercise a minimum of 30 minutes 3-4 times a week. Low weight high intensity repetitions or varied circuits will help stop you from getting bored while giving great results. Jogging and swimming are also excellent exercises. Of course the type of exercise you do will be dependent on the end results – if you are a man who wants to look like Sylvester Stallone you will be doing a lot more high repetition heavy weight high intensity exercises than a woman who just wants to cut out the jiggle.